Why Aren’t You Real: Empire Records

Sometimes I forget how much I love this movie. Sometimes someone asks me what’s one of your favorite movies and I stumble for a moment before I remember- Empire Records! Obviously this isn’t an award winning, audience stunning film, but I love it all the same. Rotten Tomatoes barely gives it a star but that doesn’t matter. Tonight I was able to watch it at Alamo Drafthouse and laughing and catcalling with the crowd made me practically pee my pants with joy.

Reasons I love Empire Records:

1. Because a declaration of love has never been so eloquent:

“And I did love you, and I still … only I didn’t realize that it really was love because it was more than love and it wasn’t just some stupid feeling in my stomach like everything else and I’ll never love anybody as much as you and I hate you! I hate you!”

2. It teaches how to deal with an armed assailant!

“Well you can’t kill me ‘cause I’m already dead. And I talked to God, and she says, ‘Yo, wassup?’ and she wants you to lose the gun.”

3. Empire Records teaches the importance of forgiveness. Even thief Warren who shoots up the place (with blanks) is welcomed back for a second chance.

4. Terrible music isn’t tolerated.

“I’m exercising my veto, man.”

5. It’s insanely quotable.

“I don’t feel that I need to explain my art to you, Warren.”

“Well “Sinead O’Rebellion.” Shock me shock me shock me with that deviant behavior.”

“This music is the glue of the world Mark. It’s what holds it all together. Without this, life would be meaningless.”

See what I mean?

6. Best soundtrack ever! Check it out.







Shit just got real y’all.

You may remember there was  a time when I was really struggling with the idea of being in a relationship with someone. I defined myself as single. It was part of my identity and the way I looked at the world. A romantic relationship truly felt foreign, uncomfortable and terrifying. 

Well, damn if I didn’t go and turn it up a notch. After dating for three years, I said yes to my Alaskan and in about 8 months I’ll be saying “I do” as well. It is a totally wild idea to me that I am actually planning a ceremony where I will be committing myself to another person for the rest of my life. How do some people enter into these things casually? The very idea is mind boggling to me. I’m actually going to agree to be with someone else forever and ever. Logically, this seems very silly but my heart is overjoyed at the idea of getting old with this person. 

I’ve been going back and forth between that feeling on Christmas morning when you’re a child and you know that Santa has come but you’re not allowed to go peek yet and also just being plain ol’ overwhelmed! People actually plan weddings for a living? But there’s so much to remember! 

Oh, in case you’re wondering, he did get down on one knee and yes, I cried. Excessively. The ring was my grandmother’s which makes it extra special. 


Post-crying selfies are not the easiest to make pretty but you get the drift.

One of Those Days

Yesterday was one of those days that forces you to be grateful. I think we all forget to be grateful usually up until something bad happens. Yesterday afternoon we were driving and pulled up next to a woman asking for money. Her sign read “Pregnant, Need Medicine”. The woman was young. I doubt we’re more than a couple years apart in age. She was smiling, polite and thankful when we handed her $3 through the window. She didn’t seem messed up on drugs or mentally ill. She was exactly the kind of person you want to give money to, someone down on their luck. But what was she doing there? How did she get there and is she going to be okay? What will happen to that child?

Later I talked to my dad on the phone. He’s someone who almost always makes me feel immediately sad and grateful. Grateful not to be in debt, grateful to have a job and glad to learn these lessons from him and not by myself. 

I talked to one of my other favorite people on the phone and learned of his relationship trouble. He put it to me like this, “It’s like we were on a road trip. I was driving for a while and everything seemed fine. We pulled over and changed seats so I could take a nap. When I woke up, I didn’t know where we were anymore. The driver pulled over and told me to get out of the car. I didn’t understand why and where I was or how to get back but it didn’t matter because the car left me and now I’m on the side of the road by myself.” 

I’ve been in a relationship for over three years. There was a point where I could have been left on the side of the road and found my way home. Now, there’s nothing more terrifying to me than having my partner in all things tell me to get out of the car. And so I am grateful. Grateful for my family and good friends and a good man by my side. 

You might not feel grateful today. Maybe you feel terrible because you have something terrible going on. Please let me know if I can help you. 

Crash Davis

My friend and blogger, Yepindeed, does blog posts called “Why Aren’t You Real?!?” and I have found a fictional character I truly wish was real: Crash Davis. If this name is unfamiliar to you, it’s because you’ve missed out on the classic baseball film, Bull Durham.

I love this movie for several reasons.

  1. As much as I don’t really enjoy watching sports, I love watching sports movies. It’s so much easier to get into a game when you care about the players. I cared in The Blind Side, Remember the Titans, Friday Night Lights and I cared in Bull Durham.
  2. It’s set in North Carolina. I love seeing sights and signs that are familiar to me. The mention of Winston-Salem (minor league team used to be called the Warthogs but is now the Dash-very disappointing) makes my heart skip a beat. When the shoot a short scene at the Asheville Tourists field, I recognize the area and the sign for Fuddruckers on Charlotte street makes me sentimental.
  3. Susan Sarandon is magnificent. Her high cheekbones, curly red hair and long legs are just the start. Her character, Annie, is vulnerable, strong and hilarious. You just want to befriend her.
  4. Crash Davis. I think I would gladly marry Crash Davis, if he’s the marrying kind of man. He is genuine and kind and always says what he thinks. He is sexy and funny. He isn’t closed off. If you don’t love Crash Davis already, watch this video. If you tell me you still don’t love him, I just won’t believe you.