One of the questions that has come up several times in the very brief time that we’ve been engaged is “Am I going to change my name?”
One on the one hand it’s incredibly normal to change your name. Even in our hip and modern times, most women seem to still change their names. All of the sudden completely unfamiliar names pop up on Facebook and I find myself trying to delete people I’ve always known. Oh wait, that’s their married name. I know that person after all.
On the other hand, it’s my name. I’ve had this name for a long time. I know how to spell it. I’ve got my standard illegible signature down pat. I have multiple nicknames that deal specifically with my last name. What happens to KBo or KBos? Now I’d be KBa or KBar? That sounds ridiculous. Not that the others are award winning nicknames but I’m used to them already. Not to mention I’m a “Bos” (pronounce Boz). Where does that go?
My identity is not my name obviously but all the same I keep coming back to the famous quote from The Crucible
“Because it is my name! Because I cannot have another in my life! Because I lie and sign myself to lies! Because I am not worth the dust on the feet of them that hang! How may I live without my name? I have given you my soul; leave me my name!”
Has another else dealt with this decision? How did you decide?